This was a write up in my February newsletter I recently published. My editor loved it (she is also my friend.) She encouraged me to put it on my blog, which I have now done. I hope it helps you to find more peace and meaning in your life.
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Love. We've heard so much about it during our lives. "It is more blessed to give than to receive." "Treat others as you would like to be treated." "True love keeps no record of wrongs." These things are all very true but sometimes hard to achieve.
Everyone is tested. We endure fiery trials of one form or another. The trick is to always bring it back to a loving attitude at the end of the day. How is that possible in some instances? Sometimes, only by the power of God Himself is it possible.
I have suffered, as some of you know, through differing forms of abuse. I have felt like I had nothing left to give, like everything had been taken from me. And yet, I was expected to love. If you've read my book Breaking The Silence, you know my story. It has been excruciating...and still is sometimes to this very day. The best advice I can give is do your best in the time given. Ten years ago, my best wasn't as good as it was five years ago. And five years ago, it wasn't as good as it is now. I still have a long way to go, but as long as I'm on my way, I know it will continue to get better day by day.
Don't beat yourself up if you have trouble being loving. Especially at times when you are hurting. Nobody is perfect and nobody can be 100% loving 100% of the time. It's not a human capability. Luckily, God is there to hold your heart in His hands as He molds and makes you into who you really are made to be as you progress through your existence on this planet. Humans are frail and fallible. But we are also very capable of learning. So keep that in the forefront of your mind. Do the best in the day you are given.
And be forgiving. Forgive yourself and others for not consistently living up to difficult standards. Sometimes the best way to show love is to forgive. And to know perfection is not attainable. Once you let go of "should, must, have to" it gets a little easier to be a loving person.
February is a time of hearts and candy and flowers. Those are all wonderful, but it is my experience that the expectations we put on ourselves and others are the most primary causes of either happiness or disappointment. So remember, we're all here to learn and grow. Enjoy it as much as you can without beating yourself up over it at the same time!
Happy February! May every day this month be your Valentine's Day!