Introducing Artist Laurie Cairone!

Eternal Optimism available here.

I am currently featuring a beautiful piece of art in my art group, Emotive Art. The piece is entitled Eternal Optimism and it was created by Laurie Cairone. Her art is spiritual in nature and flows with a sense of peace and light. So I was immediately drawn to her creativity! I am always excited to introduce new artists and authors and Laurie Cairone is no exception! I asked her to write up a post about her creative process and background which you will find below:

I have created art intuitively for more than 40 years. Why Do I create art? Because creating soothes my soul and is a form of meditation for me. I enjoy working with Pastels, Watercolor, Acrylic, and Charcoal mediums. I also enjoy now learning and working with these mediums digitally in Procreate on my Ipad. 

My interests in the Universe,The Healing Arts,The Metaphysical World, and the Mind, Body, Soul Connection influence and inspire my art. I have also practiced as a Registered Nurse for over 30 years and hold a Second Degree Reiki Certification. Over half of my nursing career was spent in the specialty area of psychiatry, so I am very drawn to the introspective process. I believe that keeping our minds healthy with positive thoughts is a main ingredient to good health. 

I have always found Art to be a therapeutic, relaxing, creative process that soothes my soul. Creativity is a form of meditation for me that allows a way of letting go of the dust that builds up over time. Art can be a healthy form of distraction for us. Creativity can open the door to self-reflection that can aid in helping us gain clarity and peace over every day life. Drawing can be a sacred process of creating images from the heart. 

The creative process for me is often from a shape and a color. I seldom have a vision or sketch out what will evolve. I love to see what evolves and once I feel a piece is finished is when I name it. Here is where the introspective work arrives. I analyze my creation and look to the symbolism behind each color and shape and that is when the title hits me. Sometimes the title provokes much contemplation about a subject, so I will then write about the piece in my description. Sometimes the description to a piece is left for me to do a little more introspection before I can write about it. 

I have enjoyed the creative process since childhood and when I look back over certain times in my life, my work often reflects the joys and sorrows that we all go through at times. I will say that creating has helped me during some of the most difficult times of my life. I experienced a stillbirth full term many years ago and creating art kept me in one piece during that time. 

A percentage of all my sales are donated to Magnolia Pediatrics to help Dr. Linda Del Vecchio-Gilbert provide palliative care to children with complex, chronic conditions. You can learn more here. 

You can find Laurie and her amazing art here. Thank you, Laurie, for being a guest on my blog!

A Recent Testimony

About a week ago when I was praying, I asked a question. It was something I have been wondering about for a while now. In order to have this make sense, I need to explain that I have two children buried next to each other in the same cemetery. One died after ten hours and the other died after nearly nineteen years. My question was this: “Why, Father (God) do you promise to bless us with long, meaningful lives and then let some of us die so young?”

I truly didn’t understand what the answer could possibly be. I have prayed that prayer so many times, believing and hoping for my loved ones to have long, earthly, happy lives. And I had been wrong twice with my own children and watched so many other young people die. It made no sense to me.

A few days ago, I was listening to a message online and I received the answer. No matter how old we are when we leave this planet, we are blessed with long, meaningful lives. He said, “You never truly die. You only change form. You live forever.”

I guess I should have been able to figure that out but the answer always eluded me. Because I was focused on this life-Earth life. I didn’t consider the transformation of death to be a continuation. I knew we transformed but always considered it a new beginning. And it is in many ways. But in other ways, it is a continuation of our time here. They joy of having an eternal perspective is so beautiful! I just wanted to pass my little revelation along!

Forgiveness

I feel led to write about forgiveness today. I have been going through a lot in my personal life. My father is clinging to existence and is having a lot of trouble dealing with the fact that he will be leaving us at some point. The family history and current situation has prompted me to think about forgiveness once again.

My life has been rough like many of yours. We have had our share of angst, anger and hurt in our family history. All types of it. I have spent years trying to overcome the demons of the past. Once I began writing about my life, I started to heal. No sooner had I begun publishing books, but my youngest daughter passed away just before her nineteenth birthday. Which led me on more rabbit chases as I begged for wisdom and understanding from Spirit. It’s been a long couple of years. During that time my earthly father became suddenly ill and has been waxing and waning in health issues for a while now.

It’s really interesting when hardship strikes. It has a way of bringing out the best and the worst in you all at the same time. Everyone in the family has been affected and it has brought the topic of forgiveness into the limelight.

People used to tell me to forgive. Counselors, friends, some family members. I thought, “If you’re telling me that what happened to me was okay, you’re nuts. I’m not forgiving those who molested me and abused me.” But I’ve come a long way since then. I’ve learned that forgiveness is a gift which we give ourselves. Forgiveness is a gift from Spirit. It’s a gift that lets us know we are loved and cared for by Spirit and that we will heal.

When I talk about forgiveness, I don’t talk about forgetting. I talk about accepting and moving on. When you’ve been mortally wounded in your life, you can’t just forget it. But you can learn to give it to God and set yourself free.

Sending some Sonshine available here.

There’s a big misconception about forgiveness. The misunderstanding which blindsides us and creates rigidity in our spirits is the concept of forgetting. If you were molested, raped, beaten, verbally abused or endured any type of debilitating trauma, I know you can’t forget it. So many people bristle at the topic and dig their feet in, promising themselves they will never forgive. But the truth of the matter is, when you forgive you are giving the pain to Spirit and asking for help. You will find that your heart will soften and you will begin to be able to receive understanding and empathy which will override your anger. After that, you will further notice that the pain of the past will begin to fade. If you take it a step beyond and decide to help others who have been through and are going through what you’ve experienced, you will turn the negativity into positivity. You will be able to teach those who have suffered like you how to transform themselves into better, more loving people because of the hardships they have endured. It really is a beautiful thing. A design of love and light.

There is nothing as precious as helping a fellow human being discover freedom. And quite honestly, if you’ve experienced trauma, it can lead to deeper freedom because of the wisdom and understanding you’ll receive as you let it go and give it to Spirit. I know it sounds strange, but it will deepen you to an internal point that will create more strength, dignity and respect within you. A sort of light that will lead others to truth.

I’m right with you in agreeing that this life is hard. But with a decision to forgive-and that is what forgiveness is-then we are learning to spread our spiritual wings and fly. Good can come from difficulty and pain. If you learn to believe it and embrace new possibilities, you will find yourself a much more fulfilled and peaceful person. It’s only a matter of time!

The Gathering Place

In my two most recent books, I write about my kids that have passed into Heaven. I tell stories about them and speak of what their lives meant to me. My youngest daughter who passed two years ago loved fairy tales and spiritual stories. When she was young, we spent a lot of time swimming in the summer. One of our favorite activities was swimming in the rain. There was something magical about being in the warm water while the cool rain dropped around us and created a mist. It was like being in another world. It was beautiful. Those memories are bittersweet now.

We used to talk a lot about folklore and fairytales. My daughter was convinced that she had been a mermaid in a previous life. She told me how she remembered sliding down some type of embankment as a mermaid child. She was always very accurate in telling the same story: she hit her head and fell into the water, drowning before her mother could get to her. It was magical listening to my daughter talk about the things of other realms. It made me believe more in other universes and possibilities.

This piece of graphic art is one I created in remembrance of my precious child. How she loved to dream and imagine! This is a piece I call The Gathering Place. It is a place of serenity and rest where mermaids come to relax and reminisce. I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed creating it!

The Gathering Place available here.

I find it intriguing that at the age of twelve I attended a writing class at a local university. In that class I wrote a story about a mermaid who fell in love with a human. Their story was one of sorrow because they weren’t able to marry and be together. Maybe there was a reason for that story. Some day I may receive a confirmation about that! In the meantime, I’ll enjoy the memories of my daughter and think of her when I look at this piece of art. Perhaps she’s waiting for me in a realm somewhat like this. You never know. Many times truth is stranger than fiction!

Essence Of Soul

What happens when we leave this earth? Where do we go? What do we do? Age old questions of uncertainty. As I speak, my father is wondering what the answers to these questions are. He has been advised to be put on hospice. I am again contemplating the answers to these questions myself. My daughter passed into eternity two years ago and I am preparing for another round.

I have spent years studying the afterlife-since I lost my first child nearly 30 years ago. I have read books, watched documentaries, even delved into a sampling of physics and other sciences. I have read the Bible. I have learned a few things but it seems that the more I learn the more questions I have.

Essence Of Soul I available here

Is it even possible to understand what we look forward to after we leave here? I think as God’s children we will come to know much. But I don’t think we could ever know all. Only God, in His wisdom could ever understand all of the nuances and infinite possibilities that His realm has to offer.

When I was younger, I imagined Heaven to be a place where we floated around on clouds and watched angels fly by. Now I believe Heaven is so complex that it would take eternity in itself just to begin to comprehend all there is to know. I guess I’m grateful for that. Because I don’t like to be bored! So I am looking forward to being infinitely amazed once I get over there. And very much looking forward to seeing my children again.

A parent-child bond is a beautiful thing. I could share stories of visitations from my children; signs that they are still around. And actually I do share quite a few stories in my upcoming book. It was written as a dedication to my youngest child that passed away two years ago. I prefer to say that she graduated. Anyway, now as I prepare to send my father off in God’s love and light, I hope he sees her and tells me that she’s doing well. I know she is. I still feel her around me, wrapped in God’s love. A beautiful feeling. I am and ever will be grateful for that love and that guidance until I too join them on the other side.

Essence Of Soul II available here

I created these pieces of art as I imagined what we look like when we journey Home. I think of us as being healthy, happy, in perfect condition physically with God’s beautiful light shining in and all around us. Overwhelmed with gratitude and peace. That’s how I hope it will be. I look forward to hugging and laughing with my dearly departed ones. Until then, I will write and create art inspired by the beliefs that I hold.

I am convinced that this life is a learning ground. A school for the soul. I know I’ve learned a lot here and I still have time left. So I strive to do my best through the good and the bad to evolve to a point where I can be happy and peaceful here as well as in Heaven. That is what I wish for all of us. And for understanding that we can forgive and move on from all types of hardship, knowing that the harshest of days create in us empathy, compassion and understanding. All qualities that I consider to be of high spiritual significance.

Until next time, take care and try to enjoy your journey. The time we have here really isn’t that long. Even one hundred years happens in the blink of an eye. If we make the most of it and learn from our pain, I believe we have gained enough wisdom to enjoy our next phase of existence!

Spotlight: Strxia: The Odds Are Against Us by Matt Michel and Maggie Daniels

“Harper Williams” is a fictional 11-year-old sci-fi book fan who is the representation of readers

of STRXIA: THE ODDS ARE AGAINST US. Below, Harper interviews Maggie Daniels and

Matt Michel, the authors of the book, by posing questions they frequently get from readers.

Harper: I read tons of books, especially science fiction like your book STRXIA: THE ODDS

ARE AGAINST US. What do you think sets your book apart from all the others out there?

Matt Michel: Great question, Harper. Certainly, the primary goal of any science fiction book

for children ages 8 to 12 is to entertain, so action-packed entertainment was our first priority.

However, we go one crucial step further by incorporating a few STEM (that stands for Science,

Technology, Engineering, and Math) principles along the way. The best part is, as an 11-year-

old reader, you might not even realize you are learning something! One of the physics principles

explained in the book is how a rocket works.

Harper: Whoa! Are you telling me I’ll understand how a rocket gets off the ground and flies

into space after reading your book? I thought it was a book about baseball.

Matt Michel: That’s right. It is a book about baseball. But it’s also about a parallel world

called Strxia. The world of Strxia is governed by the same laws of physics as Earth. When the

main characters in the book realize that their actions on Earth impact Strxia and vice versa, they

begin to learn how to use physics to help them save Strxia and win a baseball game on Earth all

at the same time.

Harper: What about the characters? I mean, most characters in the books I read are big guys

full of muscle and athletic talent. That gets old sometimes.

Maggie Daniels: I feel the same way, Harper. That’s why our main character, Seth Cox, is just

the opposite. He would rather be at home, reading on the couch and snuggling with his dog, than

playing baseball games. Intellect is our hero’s main talent, and only his brainpower can help

Strxia survive.

Harper: Seth seems cool. Is he the only character in the book?

Maggie Daniels: Seth has plenty of help from an interesting group of teammates. Each of them

has their own special skills… and vices. Alex is the only girl in the boy’s baseball league. She

is fearless and the fastest runner on the team, but she never has been able to quite fit in. Jared is

all bravado with the county’s best baseball arm, but he is an egotistical mess of a hothead.

Finally, there is Chase. Chase is always kidding around but is a superb mechanic.

Harper: Is something wrong with Strxia. Why does it need saving?

Maggie Daniels: Oh yes, Strxia needs help. An elite group of scientists called the Odds have

found a way to control odd numbers on Strxia. The Strxians actually have to pay money to use

odd numbers, and not everyone can afford to do so. So their world is slowly falling apart

because without numbers, it is really hard to learn. Just imagine a world with no odd numbers!

Harper: The book seems to cover a whole bunch of different things. Wasn’t it hard to write?

Maggie Daniels: Well, besides being my co-author, Matt is also my husband. He and I have

worked together coaching baseball, basketball, and robotics. My job at George Mason

University is to teach, carry out research, and write, so writing is a natural process for me. Matt,

on the other hand, is a “rocket scientist” and has a firm grasp on all the physics in the book. In

fact, he calculates, with aerospace engineering accuracy, all the numbers in the book so that even

the most discerning teachers and librarians are satisfied. Together, we created a book we think is

quite unique.

Harper: This all sounds really great, but I have to ask, how on Earth do you pronounce Strxia?

Maggie Daniels: The name of the book is a fun story, because we went through many iterations

before we created one we really liked. Try saying “Strick-see-ah” – that will get you really

close!

Harper: If I have more questions, how can I contact you? Or if I want to buy the book, where

can I do that?

Matt Michel: We have set up a website for our book as well as author pages on Facebook:

View Matt’s page here and Maggie’s page here. Our book is available on Amazon.

Grief Is A Life Changer

When my daughter passed a few years ago, I was beside myself with grief. I felt like the bottom of my life had dropped out and I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t know what to believe and I began to question everything that I thought I knew up to that point. It is amazing what the effects of grief can do to you, not only physically but also mentally and spiritually.

I had been a Christian for almost twenty years before my daughter passed. I talked about spirituality every day with my kids. Spirituality was the backbone of my life. But when my daughter left me, I not only felt betrayed but I was so devastated that I begged for answers to questions that only God could provide. I went on a spiritual quest. I even left my home for months in search of answers. And I received many-positive and negative.

While I was on my quest I wrote my book entitled Finding Hope In The Darkness Of Grief. I studied spiritual concepts and immersed myself in spiritual literature and theories. I sought understanding and wisdom. I begged for enlightenment. And I received a lot. But the more that I learned the more questions were raised. God is an amazing, powerful, loving entity that holds so many facets of information and wisdom that it is mind boggling. So I came to a point where I decided that having the faith of a child is a very valuable trait.

Yes it is important to continue learning and seeking. But it is also important to believe without doubt. To know that spirit is powerful, all encompassing and infinite. To understand that human capacity can never fully comprehend all that God is. I came to the conclusion that I could seek for all eternity and still have questions. That is a beautiful thing when you have the faith of a child.

I am one of those people who wants to learn and understand as much as I can. I want to seek and find. I want to grow in spiritual stature. The beauty of a belief system like that is the fact that I can learn forever and never grow tired of finding new concepts to embrace, new facets of understanding to harvest in my life. The concepts of reaping and sowing, speaking and receiving, blessing and being blessed are just beginnings to amazing information that is yet for me to discover.

I was stretched to capacity. I didn’t feel like I could be stretched any farther. But then….spirit stretched me almost to a point I couldn’t handle. It never ceases to amaze me how our limits are tested when we beg to know more.

I have a new book coming out soon. I wrote it for my daughter after she passed. It is a dedication to her life and her love; the legacy she left behind. However, God in His great mercy, has allowed me to continue a oneness with her from beyond heaven’s veil. She and I are tied up in spiritual love and understanding. It has been hard but beautiful at the same time. Some of the concepts I write about in my new book have been alluded to in Finding Hope In The Darkness Of Grief. It has been an interesting journey. One that I will continue until I am able to hug my daughter again in heaven-and through eternity. Spirit holds us together in love and light so that darkness will not prevail.

If you have lost a child or close loved one, it is my hope that the books I write will give you peace. I believe it is true that grief is love with nowhere to go. Fortunately, when we are held together in spirit’s compassionate love and light, our love does have somewhere to go. It goes to our creator and our loved ones that wait for us. I believe that is a key for handling loss well. Continue to feel your love for those who have graduated and moved on. Because in spiritual love and light, our care and concern are received. Our sorrow is understood. We need not fear. Love is a living energy that not only transforms sorrow but also pain. Our love is received and translated to those who wait in heaven for us to join them. They are only a heartbeat away. Love is the transmitter that holds us close, that keeps our departed ones near and dear!

Meet Artist Julie Turner!

I came across Julie Turner’s work while I was working on my art site. I immediately fell in love with her wisteria prints and contacted her about a feature on my blog. She happily obliged! Below you will find her biography:

Julie received her BFA from James Madison University (Harrisonburg, VA). She spent her career working in the visual arts for various industries producing commercial art, technical graphics and multimedia. Concurrently she created fine art, representing many disciplines. Her most recent works are primarily acrylic on canvas paintings and digital art for print and home decor. Her style is a unique blend of Abstract Expressionism and Expressionism. Turner has exhibited in the USA: San Diego, CA; Las Vegas, NV; New York, NY; Alexandria, VA; and Bologna, Italy. Her artwork has been published worldwide and has been sold to many private collectors.

Although she’s skilled in many art disciplines: drawing, painting, printmaking, photography, sculpture, stained glass, jewelry, video, multimedia and digital imagery, she has a strong drive and passion for painting. She enjoys experimenting with difficult paint challenges and likes working with bold paint colors and varying degrees of paint thickness and layering. She’s inspired by love, family, friends, nature, music, dreams, astronomy and spiritual/metaphysical subject matter.

After I contacted Julie, I found that she and I share similar interests. Not only is she an artist but she has also written a children’s book. A kindred spirit indeed!

If you’d like to contact Julie, you can find her on her Website, Facebook, Fine Art America, and Handmade At Amazon. You can find Julie’s book here.

Dream 06 Julie Turner

Discerning The Journey

The days

Remind us;

That

What once was

Will not be

Again.

Our memories;

Some sorrowful,

Others treasured;

Pull us back

Into yesterday.

We need hearts

To discern,

Our ever moving

Forward;

On paths we

Were destined

To walk.

We prepare

To meet

The judge and jury

Of the seasons-

Moments of old;

That whisper

What once was;

That speak

Of who

We truly were

And what

We truly wished

To have become.

We eat the fruit

Of our decisions

When Spirit asks,

That we explain ourselves,

Before

We journey Home.

The Meaning Of Christmas

Since Christmas will soon be upon us, I have dedicated this post to the season. The most obvious reason for this time of year is Jesus’ birth. But what else does it mean? Here are some of my thoughts.

Christmas to me is a time of regeneration. We are reborn into a spirit of love and community. Christmas is a season of goodwill and celebration; a time of remembrance for a Savior born of man. Christmas is a time of refreshment and renewal. A time of new hope and promises which began by the birth of a child destined to lead us into a spiritual place of wonder and love.

Christmas is also a time of respect and observance. For God, for His son, for Spiritual insight and wisdom. The truth of the season is that we are loved more than we can ever know while we walk this earth. Here we encounter hardship and suffering, disabling our ability to live in complete peace and rest. But hardship gifts us with great understanding that eventually leads to more respect not only of spiritual matters but also of our fellow man. These truths of Christmas live in each day of every year.

Christmas is a time of passion. A time to remember One who came for all of us because of love. A time of redemption and purpose. We all crave love. We all crave understanding, empathy and compassion. These are things we find as we seek Oneness with our Creator and greatest love, no matter where we live or what we do for a living. We are all part of the great whole of life, each of us being of immense importance to the prosperity of the Oneness into which we were born.

Christmas is a beautiful time. It can be difficult because of loved ones having left us or situations in our lives having let us down- jobs, friendships, death-but the truth remains that we can still find some semblance of beauty if we only look through Spirit’s eyes of love and light. Life is a mirror of things which we need to learn. It is also a test of what we have learned. In the light of eternity we can only be more blessed after having learned harsh lessons. Our reward is deeper truth, love and understanding after the impact of hardship has marked us.

It is all about perspective. And understanding. We can always dive deeper into realms of truth and insight. Christmas is a reminder to me of that very profound fact. There is always more to learn, there is always more room for us to grow. That is my Christmas wish. Not only peace on earth and goodwill to men but also a profound Oneness which emcompasses nature and every living, breathing thing.

That is what I wish for you, for me and for this wonderful planet that we call home. That’s one of the greatest enticements offered by heaven: the Oneness that we all are part of. The love and enlightenment that we all share.

Merry Christmas and very Happy Holidays!

Book Review: Just Wondering by Suzanne Werkema and Tina Modugno

Just Wondering is a book of rhyming and non rhyming poems for older kids (age 9-12). It is a cute assortment of fun poetry about everything from science to imagination and everyday life.

This book would be a great addition to a classroom as it is not only fun but also educational. Illustrated with colorful pictures, Just Wondering would make a great gift as well.

My rating: 4 Diamonds <> <> <> <>

You can find Just Wondering here. And you can connect with the authors on Facebook, Twitter and their author website.

A Fun Christmas Video!

Hello! Today I’m sharing a video that I created for my award winning books. It’s a Christmas video (hint, hint!) that features each of my books published so far.

Breaking The Silence, my first book, is a memoir about my life. Though it is listed as fiction, the story is true except for the fact that names and places have been changed to protect the identities of loved ones. If you or someone you know loves to curl up with a good book, take a peek at the video.

Poetry and Ponderings is also about my life. It’s a book of poetry and prose regarding healing and moving on from rough patches we all find ourselves in from time to time. This book is a great one for poetry lovers!

Also included is Finding Hope In The Darkness Of Grief, my most recent book about the tragedy that befell our family several years ago when my youngest daughter died. Finding Hope is a book of poetry, prose and art. I included a few pieces of my paintings, digital art, mixed media, photography and pencil drawings. The ratings have been wonderful on this book as well.

About a month ago I was approached by an editor of The New York Review Of Books who suggested that I have my work featured in their paper. I happily obliged and now all three books are being advertised there as well. I am humbled and grateful that my work is being recognized and well received. So much pain and hard lessons learned went into this work that it really means a lot to have such a favorable response.

If you have a chance to watch the video, I’d love to receive feedback! Feel free to message me on my contact form. Merry Christmas!

What Is Forgiveness?

Forgiveness is a concept that many times is widely misunderstood. When people think of forgiveness, they often think of having been wronged and perceive forgiveness as having to completely disregard the perpetrators who’ve harmed them and the pain they’ve inflicted. I don’t view forgiveness this way.

---

When I think of forgiveness, I think of letting go of all the angst, fear and anger that a victim holds against perpetrators who have wronged them. I don’t view forgiveness as forgetting. I view it as having empathy towards oneself.

When we hold grudges we aren’t hurting anyone but ourselves. Those who have wronged us aren’t affected by our emotions unless we take it upon ourselves to harm them back. (Which obviously is not a good idea).

The only person who is affected negatively by unforgiveness is the person who is not willing to forgive. Why? Because unforgiveness allows bitterness to become a large part of a person’s life and views. Also because unforgiveness causes disease within the victim. Stress is a factor in cancer, heart problems and a myriad of other health issues. Not to mention the negative effects of stress on attitude and daily habits. Many stressed out people have depression, anxiety and OCD just to name a few issues. I know this first hand because I held unforgiveness inside of me far too long regarding things that happened in my childhood.

When we live in anger, we perpetrate more hardship on ourselves because of bitter attitudes and aggressive tendencies. It’s not a fun way to live. It’s more like surviving under threat than living in peace and happiness. Nobody deserves to have a life like that. We all deserve to be happy. And in order to be happy many times we must change our mindsets. And that includes being willing to let go of anger and angst towards those who’ve wronged us. We can remember and not allow ourselves to be around those people any longer but it is definitely in our best interest to forgive and move on.

Sometimes it seems crazy to forgive. Like me trying to come to the conclusion that I was going to forgive my perpetrators who molested me. Did I want to forgive? No. Because I thought that it meant I had to be okay with what happened and even be willing to go around those people again. When I realized that forgiveness was remembering from a peaceful standpoint and not allowing myself or my children to be around those people I was much more willing to give it a try. Forgiveness is a process. It may take years to completely let go and move forward but it is possible even in extreme situations.

This is a topic that I talk about in my books. I’ve had a lot of forgiving to do and I’m getting better at it with practice. Once I realized I was only hurting myself I knew I had to let go and move on. Because I knew I deserved better. So do you. Everyone deserves happiness and peace. It takes a mindset of wisdom and understanding but it is so worthwhile that even if it takes years it’s a journey that you should deeply consider.

Once you value yourself enough to seek love and good out of life you’ll attract more love and good to yourself because you know you deserve it. What a great way to move forward, don’t you think?

Why Abuse Is So Hard To Heal From

In my books I speak about abuse I suffered as a child. I don't go into detail but I do explain how much abuse hurts. And how wonderful it is to heal and be able to move on. One of the reasons why I wrote these books, which are entitled Breaking The Silence and Poetry and Ponderings, is because abuse is such a difficult thing to recover from. Why? Because it is a taboo subject. Back when I was victimized, people just didn't talk about it. Especially sexual abuse. Victims of abuse feel as though they can't tell anyone. Not only because the perpetrators threaten them but also because it's not a topic you can just talk to anybody about. That's why I'm grateful that in recent years it has been looked upon in a more open way. Victims are beginning to share more about these types of things, which is a powerful step not only for them but for society as a whole.

Another reason that I wrote my books is because victims feel alone and helpless. When somebody invades your personal space, you are threatened on a level that can't be described in any way but terrorizing and dehumanizing. When I was victimized, I was terrified of those who had their way with me. I was a child and I felt like I had nowhere to turn. It is extremely difficult to have someone not only invade your space and body but also your mind. All of those factors go into many forms of abuse. Victims are victimized on such deep, personal levels that they feel 'boxed in' and unable to defend themselves. Particularly when those victims are children.

Victims also have a reaction that is defined as 'learned helplessness'. They feel like they've been ostracised so they continue operating and living in vicious cycles instead of hoping to break free. That is why victims need a voice. Especially children. It is so difficult to make a child understand that what is going on is not their fault. They take on the blame and shame and hold it inside themselves, growing up with a warped mindset that they're lesser people because of what happened to them.

I am so grateful for places like RAINN. It is becoming more accepted to talk about abuse and victimization. This is what we need for people to heal and understand that not only is what happened NOT their fault but also that they have the right to seek happiness and have hope to be able to heal from the trauma. It is only with a societal mindset of understanding and openness that abused people will be able to adopt the fact that they are worthwhile and what happened to them does not define them. Before anyone can heal, they must first accept what they've experienced and realize they have the right just the same as anyone else to find peace and freedom.

Guest Post: Grief and Sleep: 4 Ways To Get Back To Sleep After A Painful Loss by Sara Bailey

Today I have the privilege of introducing you to Sara Bailey. She, like me, has recently gone through a painful loss. Her loss was her husband.She approached me about writing a piece for my blog and I gratefully agreed. As you may know, I just wrote a book about the loss of my precious daughter entitled Finding Hope In The Darkness Of Grief. Sara, too, is in the process of writing a book about her experience.

Loss is very difficult. And so is being able to relax and move on. So, without further adieu, here is Sara's article. I hope you enjoy it!

Recovering from the loss of a spouse or a partner is a long — and often lonely — journey. Regardless of how much support you have, there will be times you have to face the grief alone, and night time is one of them. Loss of sleep is one of the most natural — and also frustrating — symptoms of grief. While trouble sleeping in the first few days or even weeks is very common, you shouldn’t have to sacrifice your sleep to your grief. Here are a few tips to help you ease the ache of sleepless nights.

Meditate to Let Go of Ruminative Thoughts

Studies show that some of our most powerfully negative and painful thoughts creep in at night. We don’t have the business of work, family, school, or other responsibilities to distract our minds like we do during the day. The grief, anxiety, anger, and sadness — plus bittersweet memories — often hit us the hardest at night. Meditation is one way you can practice letting go of those thoughts. Plus, the work you do focusing on your breath and muscles can also help ease your body into sleep. There are several different kinds of meditation you can try. In guided meditation, a narrator guides your mind through a journey to a state of mind you’d like to achieve or a goal you want to accomplish. You could also try a progressive muscle relaxation meditation where you tense and then relax each muscle in your body, slowly and methodically, from your head to your toes to help bring you comfort.

Renovate Your Bedroom for New Memories

Your bedroom may hold memories of your partner that keep you up at night. Memories are powerful ways to keep our lost loved ones alive, but they can also keep us stuck, blocking us from moving through the pain. Consider a bedroom remake to help you feel like you are in a new space. Start with your bed, especially if your mattress is older and needs replacing anyway. You can save time and money by purchasing a mattress online instead of in a store, which usually comes with a generous trial period so you can make sure you’ve made the right choice. Once you’ve chosen a new mattress and bedframe, you can paint the walls a new color — soothing blues and greens work wonders for sleep — and hang a few blackout curtains, which will keep excess light out, signaling to your body it’s time to rest.

Start a Regular Exercise Schedule

Getting at least 30 minutes of moderate exercise every day will make a major impact in the quality of your sleep. Physiologically, your body needs sleep to recover and rebuild, and exercise further encourages that process. Your mind and body will need to spend more time sleeping and will require better quality sleep. On top of that, research has shown that exercise is a positive coping mechanism for managing stress, anxiety, and depression — three emotions you are likely to feel as you move through the stages of grief. The endorphin surge and physical exhaustion you feel when you exercise is an unmatched mind-body boost.

Get Gadgets (Not Gimmicks!)

In a world that emphasizes immediate gratification, there are a lot of gimmicks out there that will try to “guarantee” you better sleep. Trust your intuition and approach these get-sleep-quick gadgets with caution. Be sure to look for sleep-aiding technology that is reviewed and approved by sleep professionals and organizations with solid reputations. For example, the Aura is a sleep tracker that offers light therapy, sleep programs, and wake-up programs. If you purchase sleep tech, be sure it comes with a trial period or a money-back guarantee so you don’t waste your hard-earned cash on a product that’s not right for you.

There is no set timeline for mourning; taking it slowly might seem frustrating, but it could also be a better long-term solution. You can build back a regular sleeping pattern over time if you take it slow, plan for sleep with intention, and focus on mind and body.

If you enjoyed Sara's post, you can find her at http://thewidow.net/

Thanks for taking a moment to stop on my blog.  Have a blessed day!

Review Of Princess: The Early Life of Queen Elizabeth II

I found this book to be an interesting account of Queen Elizabeth II's life.  I learned a lot about the customs of the royal family as I read through the book and was intrigued by their function in British society.  I also found the information regarding the responsibilities of the royal family to be eye opening.

This book was well written and contained facts about the royal family of which I wasn't aware.  I would recommend this book to anyone interested in learning more about the monarchy of the United Kingdom.

My rating:  4 Diamonds  <>  <>  <>  <>

Where to purchase this book:  https://www.amazon.com/Princess-Early-Life-Queen-Elizabeth/dp/1493034626

Life Is A Pandora's Box (Excerpt From Finding Hope In The Darkness Of Grief)

In my most recent book, Finding Hope In The Darkness Of Grief, I wrote a statement in the foreword section of the book that I will be elaborating on. Following is what I wrote. This three dimensional plane offers much for us to learn: happiness, wisdom, understanding, pain, loss, heartbreak, wonder and enlightenment. It is a Pandora's box of emotions, situations, opportunities, and failures, all wrapped into a package we call life. Nobody is immune.

Why did I write Finding Hope In The Darkness Of Grief?  

I decided to write Finding Hope In The Darkness Of Grief to help my readers come to terms with hardships they've faced in life. Life has a way of creating a roller coaster effect for us. Some days we're high on life, laughing, content, fulfilled. Then come the days when we're angry, hurt and bitter. The hard days will always come because that's how we learn.

We each have a purpose. 

Each of us was created to leave a footprint on this planet that will remain long after we're gone. The only way we can leave that footprint is by finding out who we are and what we do best in the most positive sense possible. Our experiences in life are the ways in which we learn. When we realize what our talents are, we can lean on Spirit to help us make our destinies come to pass.

Living your purpose is a beautiful thing.  

Have you ever felt the amazing beauty of beholding something only you could do? Whether it be a child you've had, something you've created, a way in which you've helped someone else or a tribute or talent you've shared with the world, something you-and only you-could do? The feeling is monumental. Awesome. Fulfilling. A reason why you have been set upon this planet for such a time as this!

We are so diverse as a species.  

The human race is so talented and abundant  that the possibilities of destiny cover a huge range of ideas, circumstances and situations. Some of us are born to help the environment, others to bake, still others to sing and dance and create beautiful things. The sky is the limit where human potential is concerned. And what you've been set here to do is what you love. What you gravitate to. Life has a way of honing your skills until they're ready to be unleashed upon society and the planet.

We each have been called to learn.  

Without the valleys of heartbreak and the mountains of happiness those talents aren't defined. We all need the wisdom, understanding, compassion, gratitude, forgiveness and awareness that refines our capabilities so that we contribute our absolute best.  That means experiencing the good, and bad, in life.

Spiritual insights are valuable ways in which to grow. 

I share spiritual insights in my book that I've learned through living. Things that have spurred me on to bigger and better aspects of life. Sharing the bliss of your best is a momentous occasion in which to prosper. Spiritual truths guide and heal. Spirit's love improves and expounds upon that which you have been born to complete. With the help and vision of clarity from these insights, I have found that I am able to contribute on a larger and larger scale. It is my hope that you will be too. We need you! We are all important parts of the whole!

A Childlike Faith

(In The Mind Of A Child by Diamante Lavendar)

When you are young, you are expected to act like a child. Adults cater to your imagination and your impulses. They laugh at your silliness. But they scold when you act too foolish or impetuous. Being a child is a wonderful thing if you are living in a safe, happy environment. Being a child can also be torturous if you find yourself in an unsafe, angry environment.

As you mature, you are expected to act like an adult, to see things with an adult perspective. And that is very important. However, I'm writing today to submit the suggestion that it is still important to have a childlike faith even when you're older. Why? Because it makes your path of spirit and purpose a little easier.

This world is many times one of condemnation and indignation. Unforgiveness reigns supreme among people who don't understand each other. Not everyone lives that way, but many do. And we can only gain wisdom about what we've experienced not only firsthand but through those we are connected to. What our friends and family have gone through affects us. Our experiences and our family and friend's experiences formulate into ideas and concepts, possibly rules, within our lives.

This is where spirit steps in. We are coaxed to have the faith of a child. It says in the bible that those with childlike faith inherit the kingdom of heaven. Why would this be so? Because life throws curve balls of pain and anguish at us. And if we can't find an answer to the problems, we develop resistance and anger that takes root deep inside our souls and spirits. It takes courage to have faith like a child when you're an adult. Great courage. You may be labeled as "simplistic" by some. But this type of faith is a great asset because it opens you up to deeper spiritual understanding.

Life is hard. For everyone. In order to "go with the flow", we need to fight the compelling desire to rebel when hardship hits. I'm not saying that in some cases the police and court system don't need to step in. What I am saying is that inside our hearts we must be willing to be pliable enough to be able to bounce back when we are devastated. If a loved one dies, divorce ravages us or some other harmful plight happens, it does no good to live in anger and resentment. If we do we are only hurting ourselves.  We must be willing to yield to spirit's call of childlike faith in order to withstand the storms and torrents of life. What doesn't kill us does make us stronger.

Children are amazing little vessels of hope and positivity. They don't need an explanation in order to forgive and move on. What a world it would be if we could live with that type of attitude. The destruction would lessen so much that it would make this world a much better place. Pain would still be prevalent but probably not running rampant as it does today. Looking at the world through the eyes of a child is an amazing gift and a wonderful, accepting state of being.

Broken Heart Syndrome

It is actually true that someone could die of a broken heart. When a loved one suddenly and unexpectedly passes away, those left behind can experience what would seem to be heart trouble. It is thought that broken heart syndrome is caused by a surge of stress hormones in the bereaved person. (mayoclinic.org).

Broken heart syndrome can also be caused by other stressful things such as abuse, a dire medical diagnosis, divorce and strong arguments. People who have endured a lot of loss in life are more susceptible. It is possible to have broken heart syndrome more than once in a lifetime too. (mayoclinic.org)

There are 11 documented cases of dying from a broken heart that you can read about here:https://thoughtcatalog.com/daniel-hayes/2015/11/documented-cases-of-people-actually-dying-of-a-broken-heart/

When my kids died, it devastated me. It changed my personality and outlook. As each tragedy occurred, I was affected more deeply. Having a broken heart is real. I began writing about the loss in my life not only to vent but also to help other people who found themselves in the same situations. It takes guts to heal and sometimes we don't feel like we can. In my case, my spiritual beliefs have carried me through.

If you'd like to read more about my experiences and the insight I gleaned from them, I have three published books that talk about my life. Breaking The Silence and Poetry and Ponderings, which have both been very well received, deal with abuse and loss. Finding Hope In The Darkness Of Grief, my most recent book, speaks of the devastating loss of my 18 year old daughter. These books are inspirational and have helped many people already. It is my prayer that they can help many, many more.